A short reflection on self development and how to grow together.
We aren’t where we were two years ago
This week, Jessica and I were driving back home after a 3-hour nude photo shoot at the Erotic Garden and Teahouse in Chiang Mai, Thailand.
This was her first professional shoot, with a professional photographer, and in partnership with the Erotic Garden (they invited us to come on a day when they were closed, so we would have the grounds to ourselves).
But this isn’t a reflection on the shoot (although it was incredible, and you should check it out), it is a reflection on our conversation during our moped drive back home. While on the back of the bike, Jessica said: “we aren’t where we were two years ago.”
Skin must be shed
Sure, we have skin in the game. But skin must be shed if you don’t want to create an idol, waiting to decay.
We aren’t where we were two years ago.
Two years ago we moved to Chiang Mai, Thailand. Right now we are still in Chiang Mai. But we aren’t in the same place, because we aren’t the same people – or at least, not in the same resolution.
In every sense, other than the physical fact, we are not in the same place.
This is true because for the past two years we’ve been working our hind-quarters off, morning, day, and night, for seven days a week. In doing so, trying to turn what we love into something that both fulfills us and is sustainable.
We did this separately (as in, we both have individual work and brands), and together (we had to learn how to work together, succeed together, and deal with setbacks together – not simply just be married… together).
It’s working, enough
Nietzsche said that the ascent is the highest happiness.
What we have done, thus far, has worked – well enough.
I’m not 100% sure what the definition of success or happiness is, nor do I believe I will discover this in my lifetime. But I feel that I have come to an effective enough approximation: it is when the thing you desire most is your own life… just more of it.
The things you do, just more of it. The day-in and day-out, just again and again. The simple pleasures you can afford once a month, now one a week, twice a week…
I wouldn’t change a thing
I suppose if I really spent a lot of time and energy, I could begin to start listing all the things that aren’t perfect. About me, life, the world.
I could spend all day on this, a week, a year, a lifetime.
But I’d rather not dedicate my day or life to that list. Negativity is crippling to creativity.
Yet negativity and contentment are the twin enemies of self-development, and us growing together.
I know if I keep my energy and attention on how wonderful life is, and how wonderful I will to keep making it, it will become so.